Why I May Smash My TV One Day

Sure, I watch too much TV. Sometimes I watch because I'm busy and I like background noise. Sometimes I need to sleep and need something to occupy my brain so I can doze off. Sometimes I want to be entertained or informed. Unfortunately, sometimes the following things come on when my television is on, and one day I've afraid my Diet Dr. Pepper is going to end up in the middle of the screen. My Top Five TV Hates are:

1. The current commercial where the woman is talking about colon health during the toast part of wedding reception. Really? What ad agency thought this was a plausible idea?

2. Sixteen and Pregnant. Should be named Stupid and Pregnant. I hate it the most because MTV does absolutely nothing to help these dumb bunnies work things out in their lives. Also, because the last episode I watched showed the pregnant girl spitting into a Pringles can because she produced too much spit. Made me have morning sickness.

3. Just about anything on TLC. From "Kate the Shrew Plus the Innocent Eight" to "Hoarding: Buried Alive and Staying That Way" to "Toddlers and Tiaras and Total Terrors, Oh My!", it's all about voyeurism. It's not about learning anything (The Learning Channel?). It's about finding the craziest people and exploiting them.

4. Weathermen who are going to be right no matter what. "We're expecting a flood but it also may snow unless the sun comes out." They're in the same category as golf commentators who say, "Golfer A is on his way out. He's just not the same as he used to be." Then on the next hole when Golfer A hits a great shot, the commentators will say, "There it is! Just like the old Golfer A! Never count him out!" Note to both types - less is more. Weather people - give me the facts as you know them. Golf people - just shut up and let me watch the game!

5. Just about any infomercial, because (1) does using this project REALLY make you that happy cooking/cleaning/organizing? and (2) have you had your EKG checked since you lost 38 pounds in 24 minutes eating your "nutritional supplement?". In other words, I think the biggest thing infomercials sell is the idea of "let the buyer beware."

So there you have it. One of these I may actually give up television altogether. Until then, I'll just keep my soda can in check!

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Today's blessings: First Watch breakfast with Sam, Steve, Lindley, and Maribeth; reserving fireworks cruise for Princess weekend