Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Guilty Pleasures

Lest you think I am a deeply thinking, cerebral type person, I just thought I would share with you my guilty television watching. No, I'm not talking about those naughty adult shows. They would probably just confuse me. And no, I don't watch any show where people are plopped down in who-knows-where and have to eat gross stuff and learn to survive - and sometimes nekkid at that. Naw, I'm just talking 'bout regular folks - and these happen to be Texans.

The first show I would like to present is "Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders - Making The Grade - Season 10". Yes, season ten. And yes, I've watched most of the seasons. It's shown on CMT, which should tell you something. But just in case you've never seen this show, let me give you my rundown.

This show is about little girls who have always wanted to be a part of DCC (which is Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders - you need to memorize that early, because you will hear it about eighty-eleven times during the hour) and now they're all grown up and ready for tryouts. I think about a gazillion females start the process, and slowly the boss ladies whittle them down to about 50 who go to training camp, and they they whittle those down to the actual 36 who make the team.  Here are the main players:

Main Boss Lady Kelli is the end-all and be-all. She don't take nothing off nobody. And dresses to the nines (for Dallas) to do it. She's been the main boss lady for centuries, and has the thick skin (and big hair and shoes to go along with it) to get stuff done. She says what she thinks through her mouth and her expressions and is a hoot. And you needn't even think about crossing her and questioning what she says.

Second Boss Lady Judy has long blond hair, which I seriously don't believe is all that natural, considering she's as old as Kelli and been doing this as long. And they both were DCC back in the day. She plays second fiddle to Kelli and chips in with her two cents about all the "candidates."

The candidates consist of last year's DCC (remember what that means?) who made the initial gazillion female cut and the rookies who danced their way into the finals. Each week they put on a two-piece bathing suit type outfit that probably would fit Lindley or Everley and learn dances and kicks. They practice and cry and smile and do it all with full makeup and hairdos. The ones who aren't doing too well get called into the office to talk to Kelli and Judi and there's lots of tears and thank-yous and yes ma'ams and then somebody gets the dire "this will be your last night." For kicks, they bring in the dance coach Kitty who, in case the candidates have any confidence left, watches the dances and gives her opinion. And then, one day they get fitted for their outfit/uniform/costume, which I believe they attempt to make out of a cut of material roughly the size of a man's hankie.

Anyhoo, I love this show because I never wanted to be a DCC, so these women with these dreams amaze me. I can't help but like them because they are so real and so pursuing their dreams. And then I feel sad for the ones I really liked but who got cut. And I am amazed at how tiny they are and how high they can kick and how they can kick high and then fall into a jump split or split kick or something. It's just all around amazing, mainly because Kelli, Judy, and Kitty are not my life coaches.

My other show is "Texas Flip And Move." This show is on the DIY network and is another show that I can watch knowing that I will be doing none of that.

This show is about three teams of Texas - The Snow Sisters, the Young Guns, and The Lone Wolf (apparently naming your gang is important). The Snow Sisters are indeed sisters who work for their daddy who is in the house moving bizness (and probably does other stuff). The Young Guns are a young married couple, and the Lone Wolf is a older/middle-aged dude with an awesome mustache.

The premise is that the area around Ft. Worth, Texas, is booming, and everybody is getting rid of old houses to build new mansions. And so these teams go to the auctions to buy the old houses before they are torn down. If they win the auction, then they move the house to some trailer lot, where they fix up the house to be auctioned a second time, hopefully making a profit. Once the Young Guns bought a house that literally fell apart when they tried to move it. But another time they bought an old school portable building and turned it into a two-bedroom house with a workroom (and put plastic brick siding on the outside).

Anyhow, there's a lot of fun Texas-style banter among the teams as they try to outdo each other and make the highest profit. They are all amazing in their efforts to rehab houses. As is the auctioneer who sells the houses. I just wish I could see the rehabbed house moved to its permanent home. Although judging by the buyers who are shopping for the finished houses, there are a lot of lakes in Texas, because everyone wants a house "to put out at the lake".

So apparently Texas has a whole lot of interesting people out there. They certainly are putting out some entertaining television. But I have an idea for another - I do think it would be an interesting match to see a showdown between the Snow Sisters and the DCC Boss Ladies ...
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Thankful today for: family dinner; Lindley and Everley time; surprise package in the mail; afternoon rain shower; clean house thanks to Daniel

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