Thursday, April 16, 2015

Aren't You Proud?

Throughout my children's lives, people have sometimes asked me, "Aren't you proud of him/her?" And I always struggle with an answer. It's not because I'm not proud of my super-talented, brilliant, wonderful, awesome children. It's because I don't understand the question.

First of all, if there was an accomplishment, it was theirs. And the pride belongs to them, for accomplishing a goal. I'm happy and in awe and thrilled and impressed, but is proud a word I wish to add?

Maybe I don't want to add the word proud because I also don't want to add the word "disappoint." If my child failed in some way, would someone ask me if I were disappointed? Again, it's not my attempt at something and maybe not succeeding. I would be sad with them and comforting and empathetic, but not disappointed. Because if I were, then for me, it would mean I expected something that I didn't receive. And the bottom line is that it's not my expectations that are important - it's my child's.

Maybe it's because of all that baggage from yesteryear. You know, the "pride goeth before a fall" and pride being one of the seven deadly sins. Maybe that's what gets into my head whenever someone asks me if I'm proud.

And maybe I didn't let my children know enough how happy I was with them - that I was blessed because of who they were. Maybe I didn't praise them enough for their accomplishments. Maybe I should have said it loud, that I was indeed proud. Or maybe I was afraid that earning my pride would become their goal instead of achieving their own personal dreams.

But I think I know what I wish I would have said then, and will say from now on. When asked if I'm proud of my children, I will simply say, "I think they're awesome." Because they are, no matter what.
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Today is a gift because: Everley time; Ogles safe arrival in town; Marilyn and buds safe arrival in town; Molly's veggie lasagna for lunch

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