Tuesday, October 20, 2009

My Farm Talents (or lack thereof)

I grew up on a dairy farm. I had friends who also grew up on farms and today they hunt things and ride horses and still do farm things. I don't, and apparently never did. So, I thought I would list a few of the things that I never did, farm-wise, that is. So, the things I never mastered (or really did at all) were:

1. Milk a cow by hand. I did help out in the dairy barn, but there were automatic milkers. My brief job was to put a scoop of feed in the feeder bin for the cows. I managed to bypass the poop canal scoop job. My lasting memory is that I will never get the smell of spoiled milk out of my system.

2. Ride horses with any amount of enthusiasm. When I was a little girl, one of our horses bit my thumb. I was afraid of horses from that point on, believing they were out to get me, either by eating me alive or bucking me off.

3. Plant a garden. We had them - I just don't think my father thought I would be very efficient at it. Come to think of it, I think I was allowed to plant peas or beans one year. There were no peas or beans that year.

4. Tend the chickens. Occasionally I did go gather eggs, but it was scary because of the snake stories - that chicken snakes would get in the nests to eat the eggs. Add snakes to the list of things that might eat me. Besides, a chicken yard is filled with all kinds and consistencies of chicken poop. Ick. However, it is a great source of fishing worms.

5. Can any type of fresh produce. My mother apparently didn't think I was up to this challenge. Or else she didn't want the challenge of having me in the kitchen. Either way, I don't know how to put up any kind of fresh produce, except to put it in the freezer. I think there's a pre-freezer process of blanching, but it sounds too close to bleaching, so I'm probably better off buying it already frozen from the grocery store.

6. Drive a tractor. I think my father treasured his tractor more than me. And the barn, trailer, shed, and all other equipment on the farm that could be trampled in my tractor-driving path.

7. Bale hay or create silage. I smelled silage every summer, and that was enough for me.

8. Slop the pigs. We had them, and once I might have gone past their pen around feeding time. The only thing that experience did for me was to prepare me for Thanksgiving dinner when I had my own family.

So what did I do on our farm? E-I-I-Don't-Know!!
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Things that make today great: Eric at car service center; shuttle driver; grocery shopping with Maribeth and Molly; The Womens Room ladies; dinner from Demos

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