2. Babies are entertained by overweight granny dancing. However, it is best that all cameras and camera phones be confiscated before said dancing commences, lest all of America and the world be entertained by the aforementioned overweight granny dancing.
3. Babies make the schedules. Not mommies, not daddies, not aunties, not grannies, and not the best selling baby books. Babies make the schedule. And it is best if you listen to the babies and do as you're told. Otherwise, you will be doing a lot of overweight granny dancing.
4. Babies like baby swings. Unless they hate them. They hate them because they like the floor gym thingy. Unless they hate the floor gym thingy because they like the mobile in their crib. Unless they hate the mobile in their crib because they like the baby swing. Try to stay current on what baby likes. Or hates.
5. What goes in has to come out. There's lots of openings for it to come out. And it will. The best way not to get splattered by the stuff coming out is to get someone else to be holding the baby when the stuff comes out.
6. A striped onesie and polka-dotted pants make for a fetching outfit. Especially if it's clean and close at hand. And teaches you to keep your mouth shut when baby shows up at your house wearing a similar outfit that her daddy dressed her in.
7. If mommy says baby should probably wear a bib and tells you where they are, but you are too lazy to get one and put it one, baby will end up in a striped onesie and polka-dotted pants. Remember the "what goes in, must come out" theory. Bibs are the first line of defense and a deterrent to a fashion disaster.
8. Babies are the best. Period. End of discussion!
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Things that make today great: Spending the day with Lindley and Molly; Baha Burrito delivered by Molly; camry lady at Ruby Tuesday; Danny and van driver at Toyota; Molly putting IKEA furniture together for me!
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