Now Arriving At Gate 50 ...

I've always believed that there would be a point where I could say, "I have arrived." At that magical point, I would finally have all my ducks in a row, my planning complete, and I could simply live my life. After 50 years, I am still looking for that moment.

When I was young, it was going to be when I got my driver's license, or became a majorette in the high school band, or had that childhood sweetheart that I would eventually marry, or graduated high school. Or that moment was going to be when I graduated college, or finally moved away from my home town, or got married. It was going to be the moment when my children were born, or were all in school, or when I graduated graduate school. Finally it would be the moment when my children graduated high school, or college, or graduate school, or got happily married, or had children, or maybe just "arrived" themselves. In other words, my "arrival" moment keeps changing as my life keeps changing.

I have finally figured out that the only voice I will hear is when God himself says at the pearly gates, "Luanne, you have arrived." Since I am not ready for that voice quite yet, what am I to do?

I believe that I should set goals, and go for them. I also believe that time lines are important. I believe that goals and time lines can co-exist and be productive, but also that goals and time lines can be at war, each trying to be the dominant force in my life. In my continuing journey to my destination, I have to use both. I have to set my goals, and incorporate time lines when I deem feasible.

Yesterday I pondered the 10-year question. Today I reconsider it, imagining God as the interviewer.

God: "Luanne, where do you see yourself in 10 years?"

Me: "If you think it's a good idea, here's my list:

1. Alive and healthy, running a consistent 12-minute mile for a minimum distance of 13.1 miles.
2. Still writing, with a published book.
3. My family still alive and healthy, with additional family members added according to Your plan.
4. Achieving a personal peace, because of the baggage I've unloaded, and the priorities I've placed in order
5. Realizing and accepting the positive footprints I've left, and continuing to make more
6. Continuing to make changes in my journey, based on the life I lead
7. Enjoying the life I am given, with all its ups and downs, highs and lows, and twists and turns that make my life unique. "

God: "And so how do you plan to accomplish this?"

Me: "Seeking and following your advice, being confident in knowing what is best for me, therapy and advice from those I trust, boldly stepping out where I know I need to go, and just believing in myself and in Your guidance."

God: "You're hired."

Maybe I've arrived after all.