Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Yup, I'm That Kind Of Grandma ...

Of course, when you use this book (and it is an actual book)  as a guideline, what can you expect? I waver between the "good" and "bad" granny - mainly because it's only through this book that I realize what I thought was good seems to be a bad granny!

Anyhow, just so you can decide for yourself which kind of granny I am (and therefore be wishful that I was your/your kids granny or grateful that I am not), here are the Top Ten Granny Things that I do:


1. I do provide snacks for them on the way home when I pick them up from school. Usually an Oreo or M&M blast from Sonic (depending on Lindley's mood for a particular candy treat for that day). Today I stopped by McDonald's and got chocolate shakes (because Everley thought that would be a good idea and Lindley agreed. Technically there was a debate as to whether we should stop at McDonald's or Sonic, but when I mentioned that if we stopped at McDonald's, we could immediately consume them, then McDonald's easily won out). Today, upon pulling up to the drive-thru, I saw that shakes were buy-one-get-one-free. And there's milk in the shake (never mind what else), so it's got some nutrition in it. So I believe this is a complete win on all accounts!

2. I have toys at my house. A lot of them. Some of them were the toys that my children played with 30 years ago. Which means they are death traps and unsafe. Nevertheless, we pull them out and play with them. And I'm not even sure if they have ever been sanitized!

3. We watch television. Mostly Disney Jr. Because we never know what Sofia the First or Jake and the Neverland Pirates might be doing. And usually there is a lesson involved. Not that anybody who's watching tries to reiterate the lesson or discuss it. Mainly because Sheriff Callie is on next and we need to concentrate on her lesson.

4. When Lindley and Everley are over for a meal, we (or really they) eat a lot of mac and cheese. The kind you prepare in the microwave with all its dangerous microwaves. We (or they) consume a lot of it because Lindley likes it and not much else. Everley will eat almost anything, especially if you are holding it in your hand and are about to eat whatever it is in your hand. I also fix hot dogs (not really knowing or wanting to know the meat process involved in them). I do try to provide fruits (usually in prepackaged containers) and vegetables (Everley only on this one) and cornbread (which I count as a vegetable). In other words, I try to provide food and hope their little bodies can convert it into whatever their little bodies need.

5. When they spend the night, the three of us usually sleep in the big guest bed. We might read books or watch one more episode of the Disney Jr gang. We have to make sure everyone has the same amount of space and LaLa is in the middle (extremely important). And yes, when they finally nod off to sleep, sometimes I put my hand on their backs to make sure they are still breathing. Mainly because they're too old to hold a mirror underneath their noses to make sure they are still breathing (oh come on, you know you did it).

6. I buy they toys and clothes that are probably age-inappropriate and that they don't necessarily want or need. I buy them because I like whatever it is I'm buying. And I hope they like them. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don't. But it doesn't stop me from my purchases. I figure I might as well buy what I want now, before they have supersized opinions and I'm stuck with giving them money instead of presents. Because money's no fun (at least for me).

7. I do not provide them with a clean, sanitary environment in which to play and visit at my house. I figure the crackers crumbs/chips/sand/whatever they bring with them will just join their relatives that already exist on my floors and things. Once upon a time, I had a clean house. It was clean and stayed clean, but it wasn't that much fun.

8. I tell stories about how funny and smart Lindley and Everley are to everyone I know (and may not know). Because those two are incredibly funny and smart. Perhaps the funniest and smartest ever, and people need to know about them. And if those people are lucky, I'll even show a picture or two ... or a thousand.

9. I make them gifts. At their ages, they aren't really aware of my non-professional attempts at sewing or arts/crafts. Just because their sparkly skirt has the wrong color thread or no hem has no bearing on if they will wear it. It's sparkly and it fits around their waist (more or less), so it's a win. For everyone!

10. I take them to Disney World. I started taking them years before the age that I said I would take them. They will never remember their first trip. But I will. And for me, that's what really counts!
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Today is a gift because: picking up Lindley and Everley at school for a sleepover; fixing GDiz's scraped arm; Steve bringing chicken home for dinner

1 comment:

Denise in PA said...

Cornbread as a vegetable - I love it!