Wednesday, October 21, 2015


I don't actually seek out magazines to subscribe. I think I get Redbook because it went with a Disney race registration. I get Good Housekeeping for some unknown reason. I get Family Circle because I actually subscribed because it was about a quarter an issue. And I subscribe to Reader's Digest because I actually like reading it.

But it's all those "women's" magazines that get me going. I mean, what the heck is going on in them? Here's generally what I find:

  1. Fashion. Which, if you've ever seen me in person, you know fashion and I are not on speaking terms. Unless it's ten years after the fashion was hip - now it's time for me to sport the look. Anyhow, the fashion in some of these magazines are (a) things I could never fit in to, regardless of how large they could make it, and (b) don't apply to my slovenly and slothful lifestyle. So there go about one-third of the magazine pages.
  2. Beauty. Apparently there are about a zillion beauty products that I should be using. To look young and beautiful. I just don't understand how I can afford all those beauty products AND a stylish wardrobe too.
  3. Women. Who are my age. But look like my daughter's age. And the name of the article is, "This is what 50 looks like." But it doesn't look like me. Ever. Maybe if I had used all the beauty products and wore the stylish clothes
  4. Decorating. The house, for holidays, for whatever. In other words, paint everything in the room blue. Or pink. Or yellow. Or make Halloween decorations for your house, for your cake, for your meal. Since this would take a lot of effort, and my best decorating is in dust, I have to pass on these pages.
  5. Cooking. What? Once I get past three ingredients, I pass on those, too. Yes, they look yummy. But I don't know what some of those ingredients are. And again, it looks hard and time-consuming.
  6. Weight Loss. Maybe if I would read and comprehend and apply instead of eating, it might help. But there are so many different ways to eat (or not eat) and exercise (from anywhere to 10 seconds to 19 hours) that I can't keep track of it all (and I have the folder to torn-out pages to prove it).
So what would I really like to see in a "women's" magazine?
  1. Fashion - here's what regular women are really wearing. Don't they look cool? 
  2. Beauty - here's the basics - eye wrinkles are not necessarily bad. Neither are any wrinkles. Lets just talk about what really makes a woman beautiful - what's inside.
  3. Women - here's what 50 really looks like. And here's that 50-year-old woman's story. It's a whole lot more than what she looks like on the outside.
  4. Decorating - here's what a real house actually looks like - and why. Why is the couch scratched up and why doesn't that woman care?
  5. Cooking - something simple, or maybe something to help those of us who aren't big fans of cooking.
  6. Weight Loss - I need something to deal with my fat brain before I tackle my other fat. Something simple, something basic. And I need to see women who are focusing on something more than weight loss.
Sure, maybe those things are in these magazines, but they're few and far between. But those are the stories I want to read - because they're real. And for me, real is what matters.

Thankful today for: slipcover that works on the upstairs couch; shortening the curtains; Everley morning time

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